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| ::Failed High Five between Adam and Pallum::
Pallum: Dude, you're supposed to look at elbows!
Adam: Ok. Elbows.
::Successful High Five::
Pallum: See?
Adam: No dude. I always heard noses.
Pallum: Ok. Noses.
::Successful High Five::
Adam: Ok. Double. Noses.
::Successful High Five using both hands::
Pallum: Double. Elbows.
Adam: I'm lookin at your elbow and your nose!
::Successful double High Five::
Adam: Now look at my penis!
::Successful High Five::
Mike: And... This is how things get gay.
Dad (From the other room): Are we talking about "Broners" again?
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| As I listened to the new Foo Fighters Greatest Hits cd (even though I already have all of them already. Don't judge me.), I got to thinking about how many of these songs are already in my top 25 most played songs on my iPod. Curiosity got the best of me and I plugged in my iPod to see the play counts on them. I'm too embarrassed to post the numbers, but I was fascinated by how well the top 25 list represents my taste in rock music, if nothing else. So, here we go. The playlist that the guys at Jersey Mike's used to call "This store's soundtrack" - my top 25 most played songs in order of the most to least played.
1. "Long Road to Ruin" - Foo Fighters
2. "The Pretender" - Foo Fighters
3. "A Praise Chorus" - Jimmy Eat World
4. "The Middle" - Jimmy Eat World
5. "Sweetness" - Jimmy Eat World
6. "Everlong" - Foo Fighters
7. "Cochise" - Audioslave
8. "Human" - The Killers
9. "Phenomenon" - Thousand Foot Krutch
10. "Your House" - Jimmy Eat World
11. "Open Your Eyes" - Alter Bridge
12. "My Hero" - Foo Fighters
13. "Man Or Animal" - Audioslave
14. "Ties That Bind" - Alter Bridge
15. "Be Yourself" - Audioslave
16. "Up In Arms" - Foo Fighters
17. "Monkey Wrench" - Foo Fighters
18. "Stockholm Syndrome" - Muse
19. "Through the Fire and Flames" - DragonForce
20. "Original Fire" - Audioslave
21. "But, Honestly" - Foo Fighters
22. "Walking After You" - Foo Fighters
23. "Viva la Vida" - Coldplay
24. "Best of You" - Foo Fighters
25. "Everlong" - Foo Fighters
There are three interesting things to note about this list.
First, some of you may have noticed that "Everlong" is on there twice. This is because for some reason, that song is on my iPod twice. Again, not to give away how much of a loser I am, but if you combine the times I've listened to that song, it's over 100.
Second, those of you who know me pretty well probably noticed that my self-proclaimed favorite song (next to "Everlong") isn't on this list. Where is "Like A Stone" by Audioslave? Well, for starters my iPod is only 5 years old, and I listened to it muuuuch more often on cd before I got my iPod. Aside from that, Like A Stone is another song that I have more than one of on my iPod because I can't seem to make playlists right to save my life so it always duplicates the songs.
Finally, a few of you who know me somewhat decently have to be wondering "Wait - no techno?" The reason for that is because while I do have plenty of techno on my iPod, that's exactly the problem. They are all big mix cds that I'll just play the whole cd and not really listen to specific songs over and over like I do these others. So while "In Search of Sunrise 7: Asia" by DJ Tiesto is probably the cd with the most full plays on my iPod, the songs themselves don't get played a billion times outside of listening to the entire cd.
And there you have it. This is my music. And if you see any songs on here you've never heard, I highly suggest going and listening to them.
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| I'm not sure how to begin this entry. I'm not sure how to explain the million of thoughts going through my head right now. So, since I can't concentrate on my essay to save my life, I'm just going to begin writing here. We'll see how these thoughts come out. Let me start by saying that I've been working a lot on my writing lately. Why? Not because I'm completely inspired or have wonderful ideas for a story...
If I do not finish Blaze's story, I will never be able to write again.
It's a fact I'm finally beginning to fully realize. This story will make or break me as a writer.... And maybe as more than that. I'm finally ready to confess that this story is probably my way of getting rid of some of the baggage I'm still carrying from Korei. I really am not sure that I'll even be able to confidently be with a girl again until I finish it and get these thoughts away from my head. I also feel like I am learning a lot about myself through this story. It's hard to explain... But overall it could be a very good experience for me.
I was talking to another writer last night, Addison, one who I hold a ton of respect for, who told me that I am able to put things very profoundly. I was thrilled beyond imagination. Like... I was ridiculously happy. That's pretty impressive considering last night I also had the girl I'd been dating and the first real potential girlfriend in two years tell me that she couldn't see the two of us in a relationship. Granted, that didn't upset me too much. I feel like it probably would have ended badly anyway. Still, I now dub her the princess of mixed messages, just below the queen who I also will not mention, for reasons I won't go into here.
This whole thing has gotten me thinking about the past and trying to learn from it. I feel like there is one girl I owe a huge apology too. I'm not going to say I'm sorry via Xanga - I actually want to talk to her and tell her. But basically, she showed up at a time in my life when I was still rather heartbroken about my last relationship and tried really hard to make a new relationship work. A serious one. More than just friends with benefits. She really seemed like she wanted to help me. And I turned her down a bit coldly, in my opinion. Sure, I was pissed off and confused at the time blah blah blah... But I don't feel like that was any excuse. And now that I've started seeing her on a regular basis again, I think it's probably time I tried to explain how I was feeling.
At any rate, my life still feels like a wreck. But the difference between now and the rest of the times I felt like things could only go downhill, this time I know that regardless of what happens, I'm going to win. And that's an incredibly liberating feeling.
I am going to Michigan this weekend, and that's crazy exciting. Like... Insanely. I smile everytime I remember that. Not only am I going to camp along the great lakes... I'm going to get to visit Leta! I'm expecting this trip to be the single best thing to happen to me this year. Last year's award goes to the night I really feel like I became an adult, by the way. So perhaps I'll learn just as much from this experience as last year's.
Still, it seems like there are plenty of things (and people) really trying to get in my way. There will always be obstacles, I suppose.
Hah. It feels so goofy... This is like a real blog entry, right?
I think some people might be surprised to know that I (sort of) do keep a real paper and pencil journal. In fact, some of the posts in this Xanga come directly from this journal. It's funny though... Even in this journal I usually don't have anything I write that's quite like what I've written here today.
I guess I've forgotten what it's like to really keep a journal.
Maybe I've forgotten how to really put my raw thoughts on paper without trying to make something deep out of them.
That's a shame.
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| Yesterday, I got a call from an area code I didn't recognize.
My heart stopped.
Could it be her? I wondered.
No.
It couldn't be.
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